By Kathryn Sharpe
Dear fellow white folks,
There are some things that we need to talk about amongst ourselves right now, without leaning on our black, indigenous, or people or color (BIPOC) friends or colleagues. (To my BIPOC colleagues, I honor you and recognize that for too long we have asked you to carry the load not only of racism and oppression, but also of educating us and challenging our organizations to evolve.)
As a white person, I'm wrestling with how to address the deep wounds of racism and structural injustice. They have always existed, but recently have been exposed by George Floyd's killing by police and the resulting protests and uprisings worldwide. I know I'm not alone in asking, “What can I do to be anti-racist? How do I grapple with this as a youth worker? What do I do when I have no idea what to do?”
I believe that one critical thing those of us born into the dominant culture can do now is learn to be uncomfortable. We are accustomed to the world telling us that our habitual ways of doing and being are the “right” way, so we're generally used to being comfortable. But our comfort can lull us into failing to see injustice or take action. We need to learn to be uncomfortable, to be messy, and to be brave.
For too long, white people’s fear of being awkward or saying the wrong thing has stopped us from speaking up against racism. Time’s up. It never was ok, and we've let this go too long. Don’t say nothing. If we are not actively being anti-racist, and teaching our young people to be anti-racist, then we are upholding a racist system. This means speaking up when we hear racist comments, but it also means standing up when we see (or when people of color help us to see) systemic injustices occurring. This might be in the policies of our own youth-serving organizations. Because of the power dynamics in our society, no matter how nervous I feel speaking up, I am at less risk than a colleague or participant from a marginalized community. I must make sure I am not speaking for them, but I can certainly speak up with them.
As youth workers, we are in a unique position to create spaces for youth, especially white youth, to learn how to grapple with racism. We don’t need to do this perfectly—we just need to be willing to take a risk, check our own biases, and open an imperfect but real space. That is what we do all the time with youth anyway. There is a very real hunger amongst youth to work through these issues. Last week, I co-hosted a youth workshop on this topic with limited enrollment, and youth logged in 45 minutes early to make sure they got in!
Right now I am educating myself by seeking out anti-racism resources for myself and for young people. This is different than asking BIPOC people in our lives to be our teachers. Right now, we can see clearly the ways in which it is both painful and dangerous to be a marginalized person. When we ask them to be our teachers, no matter how good our intent, we may add to their exhaustion. This is especially critical with youth we work with—they need to count on us as caring adults to support them, not someone asking them to do potentially painful labor. If someone I am in a close relationship with does offer me something, I will be a grateful listener and honor what they are telling me, recognizing that they are doing so because they are invested in me. I in turn will honor them by learning it well and taking action in the future.
What is one step you can take right now to be anti-racist in your life and your youth work practice?
Sincerely,
You are welcome to comment on this blog post. We encourage civil discourse, including spirited disagreement. We will delete comments that contain profanity, pornography or hate speech--any remarks that attack or demean people because of their sex, race, ethnic group, etc.--as well as spam.
Dear fellow white folks,
There are some things that we need to talk about amongst ourselves right now, without leaning on our black, indigenous, or people or color (BIPOC) friends or colleagues. (To my BIPOC colleagues, I honor you and recognize that for too long we have asked you to carry the load not only of racism and oppression, but also of educating us and challenging our organizations to evolve.)
As a white person, I'm wrestling with how to address the deep wounds of racism and structural injustice. They have always existed, but recently have been exposed by George Floyd's killing by police and the resulting protests and uprisings worldwide. I know I'm not alone in asking, “What can I do to be anti-racist? How do I grapple with this as a youth worker? What do I do when I have no idea what to do?”
I believe that one critical thing those of us born into the dominant culture can do now is learn to be uncomfortable. We are accustomed to the world telling us that our habitual ways of doing and being are the “right” way, so we're generally used to being comfortable. But our comfort can lull us into failing to see injustice or take action. We need to learn to be uncomfortable, to be messy, and to be brave.
For too long, white people’s fear of being awkward or saying the wrong thing has stopped us from speaking up against racism. Time’s up. It never was ok, and we've let this go too long. Don’t say nothing. If we are not actively being anti-racist, and teaching our young people to be anti-racist, then we are upholding a racist system. This means speaking up when we hear racist comments, but it also means standing up when we see (or when people of color help us to see) systemic injustices occurring. This might be in the policies of our own youth-serving organizations. Because of the power dynamics in our society, no matter how nervous I feel speaking up, I am at less risk than a colleague or participant from a marginalized community. I must make sure I am not speaking for them, but I can certainly speak up with them.
As youth workers, we are in a unique position to create spaces for youth, especially white youth, to learn how to grapple with racism. We don’t need to do this perfectly—we just need to be willing to take a risk, check our own biases, and open an imperfect but real space. That is what we do all the time with youth anyway. There is a very real hunger amongst youth to work through these issues. Last week, I co-hosted a youth workshop on this topic with limited enrollment, and youth logged in 45 minutes early to make sure they got in!
Right now I am educating myself by seeking out anti-racism resources for myself and for young people. This is different than asking BIPOC people in our lives to be our teachers. Right now, we can see clearly the ways in which it is both painful and dangerous to be a marginalized person. When we ask them to be our teachers, no matter how good our intent, we may add to their exhaustion. This is especially critical with youth we work with—they need to count on us as caring adults to support them, not someone asking them to do potentially painful labor. If someone I am in a close relationship with does offer me something, I will be a grateful listener and honor what they are telling me, recognizing that they are doing so because they are invested in me. I in turn will honor them by learning it well and taking action in the future.
What is one step you can take right now to be anti-racist in your life and your youth work practice?
Sincerely,
-- Kathryn Sharpe, Extension educator
You are welcome to comment on this blog post. We encourage civil discourse, including spirited disagreement. We will delete comments that contain profanity, pornography or hate speech--any remarks that attack or demean people because of their sex, race, ethnic group, etc.--as well as spam.
I have been reflecting a lot over the past few weeks about my role in perpetuating oppressive systems. My entire life I have claimed that my values and actions stand for social justice, change, and equity. However, as I look back over my life and career, I realize how infrequently I have taken the real risks necessary to move those causes forward. I am committing myself to learning, getting uncomfortable, and putting more on the line both personally and professionally in the coming days, weeks, and months. Thank you for the guidance and resources as I figure out what that means!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for your honest and self-reflective comment. I think you are modeling exactly the kind of pairing of introspection and action that we are all being called to if we want to create a different trajectory for this country's future. There is often a huge disconnect between what we believe and what we actually do in our actions. I have seen many messages recently about the fact that "performative allyship" is not enough--it is not enough for us to just say or post things on social media (or for me to write this blog!) It is definitely calling me, too, to make sure that each week I can look at things I am actually doing in the real world that impact other people or systems. Thank you for your commitment to stretching yourself.
DeleteThanks, Kathryn for your post. One thing that I've been thinking a lot about is humility. Because I love learning, one of the things I love about youth work is the constant growth we experience. We have to have humility to learn and get better at what we do. That's the case here too. If we want change, we have to be open to the possibility that all of us have responsibility to be part of that change. No one likes putting themselves in uncomfortable situations--we like to avoid them if we can. But I've been trying to force myself outside my comfort zone--going to protests, talking to strangers (I'm a very private person, so these things are particularly difficult for me). And it's helped create a shift in my own thinking. It's helping me see what collectively we could be doing differently.
DeleteJessica, thanks so much for your comment, and for sharing about the powerful role of humility and vulnerability. You are so right that this is the space where we actually allow ourselves to become learners. Buddhists talk about adopting "beginner's mind", and it seems so relevant for this topic. It is when we admit we don't have answers that work that we can allow ourselves to ask new questions and be new to others' answers. And ultimately, that is really quality youth development practice, isn't it?
DeleteThank you for sharing, Kathryn. Very similar to your thoughts and others' - we must be willing to be uncomfortable. We must be willing and able to sit in discomfort. I recently listened to a discussion between Glennon Doyle and Tarana Burke. I'm listening a lot right now. In the interview they discussed an excerpt from Glennon's recent book: "..being human is not hard because you're doing it wrong, it's hard because you're doing it right." That has kept me thinking.
ReplyDeleteLeigh, what a perfect quote! Yes indeed. Life in a society that has been built with so many types of oppression woven into it is inherently uncomfortable if we are addressing it honestly. I appreciate you sharing this perspective. What are some other great things you have been listening to that you might recommend for others?
DeleteKathryn, thank you for this post and seeking opportunities for all of us to engage in discussions and action. I think you spoke to what I find so difficult about combating oppression and systemic racism....how do you take action? As an action-oriented person I'm grappling with what actions make a difference. The first actions I've taken have started in my own home. We are working on unearthing what history looks like for all people in this country versus what we were taught in the education system. Uncovering the meaning behind various statues has been a good starting point. Next steps have included volunteering with Urban Ventures in South Minneapolis and participating in peaceful protests. These steps don't scratch the surface but they are action steps that will lead to more.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for sharing the ways that you are bringing action home into your personal life. This is so important and while it can sometimes feel very micro scale, it also is the place where we have the most influence of anywhere. I appreciate that you are looking at history/ies--as a history major in college, I came to understand that our perception of ourselves and cause/effect have everything to do with who does the telling and where they start the story. Good for you for digging in and learning! It also makes such a difference to connect with others in community. What have you and your family found most impactful together?
DeleteHas the goal become: create groups? By name, by agenda, by class, by race, by religion, by age, by preferences, by economic background, by every possible marker. Does it all start with forming a group? “Black people must be taught to think of themselves as black and nothing else. As black victims. Certainly not as unique individuals.” The whole thing is synthetic because THE UNIQUE INDIVIDUAL is submerged. Without the individual, you have mass mind control. You have ideology taking center stage. You have endless solutions, each more absurd than the last. And what for? For the elevation of the GROUP. Marketers: “We have to do whatever it takes to stop any talk of the UNIQUE INDIVIDUAL among black-group causes and objectives. It has to be all about the group. Forever. Benefits. Welfare. THAT has to drown out EVERYTHING else. The promise of individuals emerging from groups has to be squelched. In each group, hook up minds and brains into collectives. Is that what we are selling? Collectivism? Take the true and real and twist it.” “We’re all in this together.” “Stay locked down and realize you’re not alone.” “We’ll all get through this together.” We are connected by something deeper than cliché: the recognition of the fact that we are individuals who can reach across to each other. Who do reach across. The differences between each of us are to be expected. Otherwise, we would not be unique. Let's celebrate the unique, authentic individual, not sow division by emphasizing groups.
ReplyDeleteDear Anonymous, you wrote at the end of your comment, “We are connected by something deeper than cliché: the recognition of the fact that we are individuals who can reach across to each other. Who do reach across. The differences between each of us are to be expected. Otherwise, we would not be unique. Let's celebrate the unique, authentic individual….” On this we agree. I see one of the goals of youth work as helping young people to discover their connectedness while also recognizing differences with others, and learning how to hold those two things respectfully in their minds and hearts. The critical thing for me, however, is that because of racism in our society, people like me (white, US-born) are allowed to be individuals. I am allowed to be unique and to be judged just as myself. Whereas Black and Indigenous people and people of color are judged by our society as a group, their actions lumped together as a category. I am firmly committed to every single young person in our society being given the chance to thrive, and that means not only having vibrant learning opportunities but also being free of the pounding heart and cold sweat of fear when they are stopped by the police, or of being given subtle or not so subtle messages that their lives are less worthy or that they are less deserving. I strive for a day when indeed we can all “celebrate the unique, authentic individual” as well as the rich, complex diversity of the whole.
ReplyDelete